Having gone to two consecutive gigs at Ramsgate Music Hall, it is safe to say that April really kicked off my return in to actively consuming music. While I have not exactly been shouting about music from the rooftops lately, I have remained somewhat tapped in to new releases, however in a somewhat passive way. All while wondering why on earth, I could not find the motivation to dip my toes back in to writing waters. Then I realised just how much of a live-music hole there was in my life.

Even before I really acknowledged my love for music, I had spent almost every weekend as a teen going to local shows. I would be shamelessly fangirling and doting on all the bands, whether I knew much about them beforehand or not. It didn’t matter if I had seen them once or ten times – if I had seen them in my hometown, I felt a connection to those bands that could not be matched. When I moved back to Thanet, aside from being close to my family again, my comfort blanket was the strong music scene that had been blossoming here down by the sea. Yet, in the near four years I have been back, I still feel extremely out of touch with it all. No wonder I’ve felt a little flat and the writing has been practically non-existent. So of course, I got myself going to shows again, be it on my own or dragging unsuspecting friends to a night that will either open their eyes to something new or send them running in the opposite direction – the gamble is exhilarating. Jokes aside, I think this conflict over whether to go alone or pester friends to join me has played a part in my time away from enjoying live music. There are perks to both, but I think while going through a strange sort of social anxiety spell, going alone simply didn’t seem fun, so I definitely missed out on a lot of good opportunities. Equally, I’ve lost out on good opportunities by not even entertaining the fact that one of my friends who may not know anything about the band, may well be up for joining me after all. From this point forward I pledge to buy the ticket, open the invite to my friends and if they decline, go anyway. I do it for the big shows, so why can’t I do it for the hometown heroes?

When I say hometown heroes, I don’t just mean the local, up and coming bands. I also mean the venues. Prior to April, I had only ever been to Ramsgate Music Hall once. Pretty bad going really, when you consider I only live a stone’s throw away. The beauty of this venue is quite often taking a chance on a new band you have not heard of before. However, for both shows I attended in April, I went in knowing at least a little bit about each of the bands.

First up were Thus Love, an alt-rock-punk outfit from Vermont, who funnily enough I had been introduced to while chatting to someone from yet another local venue Whereelse? over Instagram quite some time ago. I had listened to Thus Love here and there, but not necessarily got fully invested. That being said, as soon as I found out about this show, which was their last of 50 on their world tour, I knew I absolutely had to go. I had got my mojo back a little so felt no problem with going alone, and if anything, I think it was a blessing. As I waited in the bar as the support band set up, I got chatting to Lolly, who as it turns out, was seeing Thus Love for the ninth time on this tour. I was in awe of her dedication and seeing how the band genuinely appreciated it too was really special. It made me even more confident that this was going to be a great show, and boy was it. Last nights of tour can be quite poignant and being right at the front of this tiny venue, I couldn’t help but soak up all the emotion that came from thrashing guitars, an incredible vocal range that knows no bounds, and just the pure love between them all. A love that was extended to support act Ain’t. You could spot the connection the bands had built over tour a mile away and it all added to the magic of the live music scene. There is not really a lot to say other than it just felt like a really special show, and while it marked the end of tour for them, it lit a spark in me.

The feeling carried on into the next night, where I found myself back at Ramsgate Music Hall for an altogether different kind of show. Gengahr were celebrating the ten-year anniversary of their debut album A Dream Outside, which coincides very nicely with something I have been thinking about lately, but more on that another time. I started listening to Gengahr a little bit after this album was released so I have to admit I have rarely listened to it in full. As it turns out, having it played live from start to finish was a pretty perfect way to appreciate it properly, and I think one of my highlights was the drumming in Embers. I remember being deeply transfixed but then that is to be expected as I did play the drums for a good old five minutes of my life. There is always that itch to get back to drumming again and go full pelt. Maybe I’ll scratch that itch good and proper in the next coming months, but for now I am pretty happy watching in awe from the crowd.

While at the show I got talking to a fellow pub-quizzer and regular attendee of gigs at Ramsgate Music Hall about my love for gigs and having written for various blogs in the past. It is pretty common to have to your mates encourage you to keep on going with what you love, but this was someone who I have only ever seen in passing. He did not know my background of loving music before we spoke and he even told me off for not coming to RMH more often. Yet, in just a few moments he saw my eyes light up as I spoke about my lost passion. I might have thought I was just casually sharing why it is I’m so interested in gigs, but it turns out I was practically pouring my heart out to this unsuspecting man. It appears that the spark that was lit last night was starting to get bigger, and while it has taken a little bit of time, and a lot of trying to be okay with things not being perfect, here I am, starting to post again on the same blog I started years ago. It is not the first time I have made a return to the writing and who is to say how long this will go on for. Still, it has to be worth a shot, right?